The major theme in my spirit of late is possibility. It’s been lingering for a few weeks, but it all came to a head today. Kindof like a pimple. Although thinking about pimples is neither sexy or empowering.
With that said, I both love and loathe Saturday morning twitter sessions. (I’m @queenenvy if you’re wondering.) I love it because twitter on Saturday mornings is alive with lively discussion about just about anything you may have a taste to tweet about. I loathe it because sometimes those lively discussions are hella stupid.
For example, some people like to tweet at length about their sexual prowess. Some people like to talk trash about people they’ve never met, i.e. celebrities, and some people are just negative bastards who end up blocked before noon.
This morning was particularly interesting because a lot of my twit fam had death and violence on the brain. Both a little boy and a reality star’s ex-fiance were beaten to death and folks were affected. I understand the need to talk through it. The part that made my stomach hurt was how the masses decided these deaths and the many more that happen daily require an anti-violence movement of some sort. The code word for the morning was #antiviolence! *ugh*
Then Russell Simmons decided that Nas was the new leader of everything anti-violence. Then he suggested that Beyonce, Jay-Z, Kanye, and Mariah Carey should spearhead this movement as well and that he wasn’t working hard enough because they were not recruited yet. *quadruple ugh* I became annoyed.
First things first, *sigh* Celebrities are not the answer to our problems my people…we are! As my great friend Ade was brilliant to point out: “What Celebrities eat, don’t make us shit. All that says is that people continue to think that one must be a celebrity in order to get basic human respect to matter.” And that, my friends is both the truth and the bullshit of the matter.
The one profound and prophetic thing that Uncle Rush did say was that self-awareness is the key to lasting change in any capacity. Yes! I was frustrated by all the #antiviolence musings because we must finally know that that shit don’t work worth a damn. All it does is attract more violence. (law of attraction–what you focus on you find–time tested proven true thousands of years–okay)
So all an anti-violence rally does is put celebrities on a stage to shine a light on what we don’t want. We don’t want anti-violence (anti-violence means literally not -violence which is not saying what we want, it is saying what we don’t want).
We want peace and love in our communities. We want people to become aware of the impact of their actions, positive and negative. What we want is a “I Am Self Aware and Accountable Rally”. Maybe a Peace and Love Rally on the Side. But see, that doesn’t have a ring to it. People like to look all around and beyond themselves for a source to what the problem is. We point fingers at dead beat fathers, single mothers, hip hop music, and government bullshit. The blame we always always miss is that of our thinking and general mindset as a global community. WE ARE THE PROBLEM!!! WE ARE ALSO THE SOLUTION!!!! Nobody wants to hear that. Take responsibility for our own actions? Oh hell no! That’s too easy and too hard.
Think about it. For every one person who is killed by violence, how many people do you think are actually affected? Rough guess. Anyone? Okay, let’s use, AJ, Kandi’s ex fiance as an example. AJ had 6 kids and several baby mothers who counted on him to support them. He was killed by another man who probably had kids of his own. So, AJ is dead and his kids get to grow up without their father and if he didn’t have his financials in order and life insurance, the kids will probably not grow up in the same lifestyle they became accustomed. If a few were in private school, not any more. If a few lived in nice houses their mother alone couldn’t afford, not any more. So now we have 6 more kids who have become statistics and will more than likely perpetuate more statistics we all know and loathe.
Now for the guy who stomped AJ’s head in. Obvious unresolved anger management issues. He’s going to jail. So is anyone else who helped him. If they have kids, these kids now get to grow up without their father and their lifestyle is affected and they become statistics and perpetuate them.
Now for all the people who are so angry by AJ’s death and feel the need to retaliate. They get caught or die, more kids affected, become statistics, perpetuate statistics and it just goes on from there. One person dead, hundreds of people affected or more. This same scenario happens every single day in every single city USA and around the world. We’ve been preaching anti-violence for decades. Has it helped?
So let’s turn the clocks back a bit and look at the same scenario with the scope that each man was self-aware and taught accountability. Let’s look at the scenario from the perspective that each man knew who he was, what he was about and had clear goals for himself and his children’s future. I can guarantee, the outcome would have played out differently. Each man takes responsibility for himself. Each man cares about human life beyond his own. Each man knows he’s connected to thousands of people and that one death affects thousands. Each man works through their differences with respect and both men walk away breathing.
Unfortunately, we can’t turn the clocks back nor can we bring these two men back to the realm of the living or the free, but we can explain possibilities to their kids. Right now, the focus is on what these kids don’t and won’t have without their dads. But what if, we as a social community, put our energy toward lifting these kids up and showing them from example that no matter what life’s circumstances, it is possible for them to be the best they can be at whatever they chose to do. OMG. A literal tragedy for all these people, turned to triumph. All because we believed in the possibility. What if we did this for every family in our respective communties that go through tragedies? What if we all became self aware and taught our kids in kind about possibility over limitations? OMG–the ripple out theory in full effect!
I know it sounds Utopian and maybe unrealistic to some of us. We have been socialized in such a way that we seem to only see what limits us and not what our possibilities are. Self-awareness expands our consciousness to include a road toward social change. Social change is completely and utterly up to us and it is powered only by our believing it’s possible. Possibility has power. The thing that makes us so attracted to celebrities is that they are proof to us of what’s possible. But what limits us is the belief that we need a celebrity to be our hero for what’s uniquely possible in our own lives. Gandhi said: “be the change you want to see in the world”. Gandhi knew what was possible. He led a movement that freed India from the hands of Britain. What was his mantra? Social Change.
The actual truth is that in order to change the way things are, we must change the way we think. In order to become empowered by possibility, we must remove ourselves from living our lives with limits. The Secret’s Dr. Michael Bernard Beckwith said to me once: “You were not put on this Earth to fit in. You are here to stand out. Be big! Be bold! Be you!” That, my friends, is the power of possibility. Dig me?
The moral of this story? I can’t call it. Just some food for thought. Thank you for reading this though. I salute the divinity in you. Peace and abundant “It starts with me. It starts with you.” blessings. -e-