I’ve been to the wall.
I saw you there
face pressed up against it like
a nose to that glass
that glass
that keeps you out
that glass that keeps you in
the nose
squashed flat against it
eyes
boggled
as to why you can’t get past it
why
you stay there
pressed
flat
standing straight up
but ain’t moving.
I’ve been there
I’ve seen your
tears
the tears that want to come
but don’t
that heart
that wants to break
but won’t
I’ve been there
I’ve seen
that hurt
that pain
that awefulness
that comes from
loving
and not being
loved
back
not
the way you want to.
I’ve been there
watching you
standing in the rain
that won’t stop falling
no rainbows
at the end
just rain
for days,
weeks
hours
that don’t end.
I’ve been there
right there with you
when you thought I wasn’t
I was there with you
holding you up
pushing you on
beyond
where you stood
helping you
stand
hoping you’d see
through the glass
to me.
Hoping those tears you cried
would cleanse your sight
hoping that pain you felt
would make you all right
open you up
to it
that truth
you keep missing
that I keep telling
whispering
yelling
in your closed ears.
eventually
when the pain goes
when the tears stop
when the glass breaks
you’ll see it
the truth
about it all.
It seems so real at the time
but it’s an illusion.
all of it.
A ghost.
A trick
your mind plays
because it thinks it needs it
the drama
created
based on lifetimes
of filling voids
with stuff
you create
when you don’t know
that you DO know.
I’ve been there
through it all with you
as I am now
and will be
when you finally see
the truth.
Remove
your face from the wall
stop pressing your nose to it
like that glass
step back
breath a bit
and realize
it
the truth.
There is no wall.
there is only
you.
love.
and I am
wherever you are
always were
always will
BE.
That’s the truth.
I know
because
I’ve been there.
I am there.
right there
with you.
Because I am you.
love.
-e-